Well, since TJ moved out, I don't have a computer/internet at my apartment so I haven't been able to update unless I'm at my mom's or at work.

Things have happened at Raynor, that are too long to get into here, but has resulted in me working full-time hours there and part-time hours at the hospital still, so all I really do at the apt is eat and sleep. I'm at Raynor on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday 9:30-5, and Thursdays 9:30-3 (so I can sleep before I have to come to the hospital) and then Friday's for a couple hours if needed.

I've made a committment to myself that I'm going to eat better - and have since followed through. I made a macaroni salad, and this cucumber thing my mom used to make all the time, and grapes, etc. Did much better at the store so hopefully some more of this weight will come off.

TJ and I went to Chicago and Fort Wayne last weekend and had a BLAST. It started off a lil rough, but we made it through, and have wonderful stories to tell and some AWESOME photos. I'll have to scan and post some of them. He acutally did the bungee jump thing at Six Flags. I wanted nothing to do with it. We also visited the Sears Tower, and had a nice tour of downtown Chicago thanks to our screwed up directions and the Taste of Chicago that same weekend.

TJ's birthday was Wednesay so we went out for dinner and snuck away for some time to ourselves (hehehe) while his mom was still getting ready to go. Dinner at Red Lobster and dessert at the Dairy Queen. ;) Then we met back at Raynor (where we met his dad) to get my car, and stuff, and to my surprise, I got a hug and kiss before they headed to their house and me home. **He's usually not like that in front of anyone. Hugs yea, kisses no...but he pulled me aside and that just made my night.

**I'm such a tard - that just makes me smile thinking about our "alone time" before dinner, the whole night was just...lol. I'm so smiley, giggly, over it :) lol.** I digress.

Things are going much better. The trip was a good thing for us. We learned a lot about each other, how we operate under stress, how to make the best out of things, etc. So much better :)

He's realized that one of my major needs is to be touched, held, etc. My mother used to cuddle with us, rub our backs, caress/run her fingers along our arms, etc. when we were little all the time and my father used to criticize her about it because he said we'd never find someone who could touch us like that.

He does, and has recently, and it relieves so much stress for me, just to have him pull me close and just sit there. That's what I miss most fromt he trip. He would always wake me up so softly, and pull me into his arms, and I would just snuggle in and he'd run his fingers through my hair and wait until I woke up.....He did Wednesday too...:) *sighs* He has today off, so I'm thinking about going over and crawling in bed with him :) lol. He's got Monday off too!!! So we are spending Sunday together and I'm so excited!!

It's like a whole new relationship this time, really. I feel like I'm falling for him all over again. I feel that he really does love me, and I believe it more now, than I ever have.